The Sulky Attention Seeking Friend.

So I'm pretty sure most of you have one, know one or if no to both then maybe you are one and in that case you are pathetic and are actually the worst!

These people legitimately suck the life out of you!

People like this tend to make everything revolve around them. So much so that they may start fights with other friends over nothing, pretend to be ridiculously intoxicated after two drinks when normally downing a bottle of rum gets them slightly wasted, pretends to get bashed and comes back with band-aids on (that keep moving places slightly - showing that there is nothing under them), loses all their stuff (like a phone...even when they try calling you after it is apparently 'lost'), are just general buzz kills.

Well I'd just like to put it out there, If you are someone who does these things please stop because you are an embarrassment and everyone will get sick of it and begin to hate you. And if you know someone like this, my advice is simple...Cut them out of your life. They are a waste of space and are just stealing your amazingly fabulous gorgeousness and turning it into pity for themselves.

Lots of Love,
Pretty Little Bitch Girl
xx

Ever More Infrequent Sex

I have a friend, who is although new i treasue dearly.

This friend has a problem, one of which i think they are in need of guidance and advice. This issue is of high importance, it is about sex. and not just sex, about anything remotely sexual and about one of the top priorities, love making.

This friend has been with his girlfriend for years, let's say 4 for example. And here is the problem...there has been no kind of sex in at least 1 year. At least!

The friends girlfriend has refused to have a conversation about why and if i was in my lovely friends position i don't think I'd be too impressed.

The only reason i really can think of is that the girlfriend might be cheating (though hopefully not, as i haven't met her but i'm sure she is lovely and wouldn't be the kind of person to do that) or maybe my friend is just really shit in the bedroom. but isn't it 'practice makes perfect' so shouldn't they always be at it then?

I don't know. but hopefully for my friends sake things change. As honestly if i was him there'd be no way i would have put up with no explanation as to why one partner is avoiding the othes 'parts' like they have the plague! because really is one conversation that hard?

I really don't know how my friend has done it and stayed faithful. i congratulate him heaps! As I would be asking 'when is enough enough?' Way to often to have stayed so long.
And with his girlfriend, i really don't know what she's thinking as she has a great catch yet is risking losing him over something so small (yet so important) as sex.

Lots of Love,
Pretty Little Bitch Girl
xx

The Platonic Possibility

So as everyone, i have one of those amazing people who i love dearly who is just the friend, but the one who could always quite easily slip into the position of something more. My friend has been a past, but i don't intend on having him as a future. He is the kind of friend who will go to that auntie's brother-in-laws wedding with you, comfort you when you are a mess, give advice on the other potential partners in your life, never think anyone is ever good enough. They are the one you always have fun with, the one who will never let you down.

These people are amazing. Don't let them out of your life, ever! And if you make the mistake of doing this i suggest you beg at their feet everyday for them to rekindle themselves into your adventurous life that seems dull without them, and if you don't beg for them back and stay stubborn you are a waste of space and truly a stupid human being.

I wouldn't change my friend for anyone in the entire world! This friend has seen every side of me, this including the disgustingly horrible early morning me, the trashy can barely stand me, the housewife dinner cooking laundry cleaning me, and the plain normal exciting me. And these people love you throughout them all. These people are true treasures to the world.

The pain about these people although is.. New lovers get extremely jealous when you hang out with your platonic friend. And It Is one of the most annoying things as all you really want is to freely be uncomplicated with both your new lover and your old platonic friend.    ... There is also the jealousy of the platonic friend towards the new lover, the doubt they have towards how long this new love will be around and these questions although ones we all need to face aren't really what we want to be thinking about when we have a new partner on the scene.

These friends are the ones you have to literaly convince both your friends and families that nothing is going on.. Well at the times where nothing is going on.

The worst part of having the platonic possibility friend is the other partners. I on many occasions have had to define and swear on my life my platonic possibility is and is only a friend, this is not so hard to do. As on the other hand, convincing your platonic possibilities partner that you are not in-love with your friend and that there is nothing happening is the hardest thing to do. Especially as you are never believed by your platonic possibilities partner. But to think about it would you really believe that flirtatious friend who is all over your partner when they say that there is nothing going on and that nothing will go on..?!

So as my final message to all those platonic possibilities, we all love you. You are amazing, we would die without you in our lives, without you i don't know how i could have survived all those stupid Ex's, stupid friends and plain old stupid drama, so for that i thank you.

Lots Of Love,
      Pretty Little Bitch Girl
                        xx

The Disobedient Friend

We all have that friend who is obsessed with your overly sexy man of the moment, we call him 'The Amazingly Sexy Man Who's Extremely Sleezy And Your Friends Just Can't Resist', whether he be a calvin klein underwear model or just an ordinary hottie. That one friend who always, no matter how amazing or how dull the person you fancy is the friend will always decide they fancy them too. This kind of friend is an extreme pain in the ass, although in my case, I love mine dearly..  And as lucky as i am i get to have a few of these amazing kind of friends. Which is great seeing as we all love a little bitch fight over a fling every once in a while.

Not only do these types of friends do this to one of their friends, they are kind enough to share their jealousy and do this to many of their friends. If you are one of these people i suggest you don't do what i am about to share happened in a scenario once upon a time, because you will lose everything.. Just to put things in the kindest way possible.

So back to the sexy underwear model, who might I add was mighty fine.. This charming flirt was infatuated by the ditzy young girl who was drooling at his feet. Though as the story goes when this man of the moment came time to meet the bestfriend there was a bit of conflict.. Well, a bit to say the least. The ending result of jealousy and trying to outflirt your bestfriend to impress her boyfriend never goes down well..especially with flirting techniques such as an awkward pout. Friendships get ruined.. Although in my case, they were rebuilt after a few years of a gap.

But to all the lovely ladies like this, stop being a whore, your friends will appreciate it. And to the extremely sexy sleeze buckets, although you are amazing and will always be just a sleeze, you're lucky because we all can't help but love you.. Better hope you stay toned, otherwise you're screwed.

Lots Of Love,
           Pretty Little Bitch Girl
                                   xx